Kirkcaldy is a malevolent town that has created some real monsters. Birthplace of Adam Smith - the architect of free market capitalism, Jack Vettriano - Scotland most financially successful (paint by numbers) artist… And on top of all this it is also the birthplace of Guy Berryman the Bass player for FCKNG Coldplay! With this rap sheet it’s crimes to architecture seem small fry, however if I had to name my favourite carpark it would be the Esplanade carpark Kirkcaldy, mainly because it’s design is so incredulous but also because I’ve had some really good times here with my darling Popes. In my mind this mad carpark is a greater artistic achievement than any of Jack Vettriano’s painting’s or any of Coldplay’s bass lines. Is this carpark better than Free Market Capitalism? Hard comparison to make.

The design of this carpark is frankly astounding. There are a few theories on what it took it’s inspiration from, the first is that it pays homage to the medieval fortress of Ravenscraig Castle. The second is that it mirthfully apes the look of child’s sandcastle that they might build down on the beach front. Built in the 1980’s (possibly 1982) it pre dates Minecraft, but come on; this is Minecraft as FCK!

When I first visited this carpark it was still open and it was absolutely joyous parking in it. Kids were riding their bikes down the ramps, despite many signs saying ‘NO CYCLING’. Exploring this building was indeed a treat, we met the attendant on the ground floor. A stocky man, with milk bottle glasses and a very well worn high vis jacket despite the 20ºc heat. He was pretty taken a back when he asked what we were up to and I explained that I was interested in the building. I have been unable to find any details on who the architect was but they will be for ever know in my head as "‘The Minecraft Idiot”… Despite the insane slapped together aesthetic of this building it turns out that the structure is made of pre tensioned concrete and as such is incredibly robust. Given that this building’s look was build from cinderblock, the superstructure could have been repurposed but instead vast amounts of time and energy will be put into pulling in down. I don’t deny that these carparks live up to their local names of the ‘Ugly Sisters’ but as you will see in the photos below the bones of the building could have easily be repurposed into anything really. The councils plan for the site is not much of a plan at all, but it does look like there is much good being invested in along the rest of the waterfront. I’m not saying that the place doesn’t need re-developed but some joined up thinking could of saved vast amounts of energy.

As we were taught by Kirkcaldy native, Adam Smith in his Book The Wealth of Nations. He argues that free-market economies, driven by individual self-interest and regulated by competition, naturally self-regulate, maximise productivity, and generate widespread societal prosperity. I think it’s safe to say that free market capitalism has done really well at ‘driven by self interest’ part and less good at the ‘widespread societal prosperity’ part - What will late stage capitalism bring to Kirkaldy’s water front? Who can say? But I’ll keep my eye on it.

Fife Council’s - Kirkcaldy - Water Front Re-devolpment plan